today was the first day that I actually got upset. While in the shower I shed a whimper and a tear or two, but it got lost in the water and drowned out by the echoes of it hitting the shower floor. So I picked my head up, turned the water off, dried off, and started my day. This is the toughest I've been. Although I have so many questions, I don't care to ask. I know there won't be an answer, and nothing can be said to excuse it. I think what actually upset me, is the fact that he just didn't care. He felt no guilt. He knowingly hurt me. I can't seem to comprehend how someone that cares for another lies with a straight face to them knowing the hurt it could potentially cause them. I've always wanted to run to Jeff for comfort, to save me. I was running to the enemy all along. He never cared about me, he never loved me.